so, it's been WAY too long since i updated here.. but since no one follows this anymore, and i posted once in the last year, i feel free to just update away.

life has been ABSOLUTELY crazy since Ethan was born, and life is moving forward at an incredible pace. i have realised that i am not prepared at ALL to be a father, but every single day has been filled with adventure and grace from God. i think that's why a baby can't remember anything before 2 years old, because that gives 24 months for the dad to figure stuff out...

so it's 924 on a friday night. i haven't preached a sermon almost 2 months.. and i've only really spoke 4 times in the past 4. it's by design, for reasons i can't really share yet, but it's been a very good time of growth, or trusting, and of releasing.

as i sit here in my flat, alone and trying to get inspiration from the Lord on to how this sermon is going to develop... i just reflect that my life, coupled with the amazing commitment and love from Janice... and now the icing on top of Ethan.... my life is just awesome and crazy. awesome because i never really dreamt that i would be living like this.. not in the affluent sense, but in the sense of trusting in God, but being so blessed by Him too. my life is crazy because.. i lead an amazing group of young adults, i'm part of a crazy church that's doing crazy things... and i'm a flipping father! awesome and crazy.

anyways, this is a directionless rant that has me resurrecting the blogger inside of me. Jon Yang is inspiring me to press on and blog daily. i haven't blogged daily since 2008, but then again, now that blogs are very uncool, with twitter taking over the world... i find this very familiar blogger site welcoming and familiar....

so, here's my feeble attempt at allowing more people back into my brain. i really wanted this site to be about the pitfalls of my life, ministry, marriage and fathering skills.. but in the end, it's just going to suffice as friday night procrastination outlet.

my guilt level has reached capacity, and so back to the grind i go.

ps. as i pray, surf, type, write and ponder tomorrow's talk... i'm always thinking about how the people will respond... i mean.. i have been thinking about this sermon for months, since i never speak anymore... but i haven't actually sat down to write it until late this week. i know my heart, and i know how i want to see 180ers end their 2009. but can i get there? can i share what the Lord is saying? can i do it?

opps. Ethan is crying... gotta go.

much love and hopefully i'll see you again soon.


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