:reflections of a man engaged:

[before I get into this I wanted to share the video that I put up was masterminded, edited, filmed, produced, directed and distributed by Joshua Wong. In a word, he is simply AMAZING. Also gotta note that the craziest testimony i've ever heard from a stage, Karla Roscoe, click on the right. who says I don't update.]

Walking home always makes me think. About a lot of things, about a lot of people. Within 7 months, I'll be married. Wow, what a concept. Strangely enough, it feels like I should've been married years ago.

As I walking home I was rewalking my steps of the day. At lunch time I was waiting for my 1pm, and he simply ditched me. So I went wondering. I got a flaky pastry to curb the hunger. Stuffing my face, I turned a corner, and bam, looking me right in the face was someone from my Island School and College days.

His name was Ben. 2 years under me in high school meant that he was automatically not cool enough for me to talk to (I was that shallow growing up ok?), but when he got to college, it was different. My friend and I were trying to find a hook-up for cheap ecstasy, and when we went to this new upcoming small time dealer, to my surprise it was Ben. After a couple minutes of catching up, I basically went and tried his drugs. After 6 hours of a stupidly high high, and being kicked out of his place at like 7am.. I found myself walking home, chewing my tongue off, looking for a blunt to curb my coming down.

I was happy to see Ben. He no longer had the distinct features of a druggie, the bloodshot eyes, deeply sunk in, strangely skinny, sweaty and pale skin. The Ben standing in front of me was taller, a bit pudgy, in a nice suit, and was on his way to UBS after being headhunted. Nice. (not seeing him in years, with a huge piece on pastry stuck on my face, I said to him, "You cleaned up nicely." he gave me a blank look. I'm such an idiot)

Let me get back on point. In one handshake was flooded with memories of a life I left behind... A stupid, wild, wasted life. College is where I was failed miserably, but it was also the place where I grew the most as a person. When you reach your soul's ultimate low, it helps you have a better look on life when you're given a second chance.

I moved on, still rocked by my chance meeting with college friend Ben. Then, while checking a chic book store literarily up street, out of the corner of my eye I see another old high school friend. Not wanting to initiate hellos, I walked away to the other side of the store. She didn't notice me, and I didn't want to really go through the small talk, but just seeing made me think of those old times.

You see, getting married doesn't prevent you from being free, as many young men feel. It actually gives you a chance to focus on the most important person in your life. There's always going to be more outwardly beautiful people, always going to be what if's and there's always going to be times when you argue... But that's what I want.
That's the key for me and Janice, we know that we don't want to be apart anymore..

You see, I read in a leadership book that you can't really excel in life unless you know what you need to exclude, not include. That's the key for me and Janice, we know that we don't want to be apart anymore.. We are actually better as one entity. I believe that and I can't wait until I shed the status of 'single', to 'married'.

I'm seeing more and more that a marriage is not about what I'm missing out on, it's about what I'm collectively going to gain with my fiancee. word.


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