:a whole new day:

in a couple of hours we have 180. i like these few hours before 180. it's kind of scary, kind of intense. it's a lot of things that really fill my stomach with lots of different feelings. 180 is never bad. that's a certainty, but it's always a matter of just how good is it going to be this week? i normally have this feeling because i have placed the bar so high... been so expectant of God to do something amazing every single week, that sometimes i get disappointed in my self if it doesn't go as spectacularly as i hoped for.

side note: the other night i was driven around the block an old smelly taxi driver. knowing full well that i was certain that we make comparable salaries, with me maybe making more... i was appalled that he would even consider taking me on walkabout around Wan Chai. literally, going through some streets i've never been on before. thinking the whole time that man.. i'm so angry.. but WHY? i didn't give him the route, so he could've easily said that the route was never confirmed so by saying nothing i left it to the driver, which has happened to me before. then i went to the moral and ethical approach. what would posses a man to simply cheat another person.... it wasn't direct pain, like a mugging, but a simple extra dollars on the top to make a little extra, what was wrong wit that? eventually i'll get home, it just wasn't the way i was used to. then i went the plankeye way and said.. well.. maybe i shouldn't be such a tightwad with my cash and bless the guy. obviously god allowed this to happen so why fight it. i mean, we ARE Christian and we SHOULD be the best tippers...

but it was at my expense.

you know.. it was strange.. as a church worker, i know a lot of staple arguments, scriptures and anecdotes to provide someone in my position, yet when it comes to myself being in that position.. all of sudden it doesn't apply.

to sum it up...i was pretty pissed. no really. I mean, comon... it wasn't fair. he was a jerk. i hope he answers to God when he dies. how can someone be such a mean person? can't ANYONE in the world make an honest dollar these days? My, how the world has become such an ethically desolate place...

"24 dollars please"

in my anger, and personal bitchfest that only i knew about... the cab pulled up to my place, and it was actually cheaper than some previous rides in the past. flabbergasted, i paid the man as i raked my brain to pull the route out of my subconscious. just like the cab driver, it drove off into the night... teaching me a silent but harsh lesson.

anyways.. i need to go to 180. Tony Read and the Nathanator leading. i'm excited.


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