:back to the beginning:

So at this catalyst conference I was there, on my, with 12 thousand people, and I was certain that not only did not know who I was, but the few that I did talk to still asked me about Japan, one person asked me if Japan was the capital of Hong Kong, not wanting to get into it, I said yes.

Anyways, I had a seat near the exit so I could pop in and out to the many vendors of Christian merch (most free), the numerous causes and bandwagons to jump on that were on display at this conference. I was on my way to look around before the last session, when I heard my name from a voice that seemed familiar.

I turned around and standing before me was my first Pastor, Jym Kay, the founder of SNA (now Flight852) and of 180. The first person to identify leadership potential in me, the first person to inspire me about missions, the first person to kick me off a leadership team, this was the MAN. I was so shocked for a full 3 seconds, because all those memories came rushing back and I was speechless. When I came around, I gave him a great big hug and he took me under his wing for the rest of the night.

He took me to his hosts home, which was beautiful, and we had home made lasagne, salad, French bread, followed with some great apple pie a lo mode. It was a simple dinner, but for me it was spectacular because I've been eating absolute fast food crap for the last 4 days.

Anyways, I was sitting there sharing my struggles with leading the ministry, with my marriage, with my dreams for the future, with everything. It was amazing to, in a minute, sink back to mentor mentee as Jym just sat there and spoke into my life.

It was weird to have a conversation with Jym in the capacity that I was in. 180 was a dream, was initiated by Jym. It was amazing because of the momentum it had when it started. Any person, Christian or not, will tell you that it's easier to start a ministry than to sustain it, yet that was what I was called to do. And while there are 101 things that I jump up and down and yell from the rooftops praises to God for, there are still many glaring holes in my ministry that will not let me rest.

It disturbs me.

Naturally, I'm a pessimist by my own doing. Christ is still changing me, but my natural inclination is think the worst, therefore whatever comes to pass will be better than expected. I think for my own life, and before I was leading a ministry, it was fine, but how can I lead people spiritually and expect the worse for them? That doesn't work.

So that's why it was refreshing to be back at square one of my walk, when I met Jym. It was refreshing because I knew that God wanted to remind me of where I have come from, of where I was when we started this crazy journey. Not only that, but I needed to hear Jym speak encouragement over me, and then to pray for me.

There is something powerful that happens when pastors allow themselves to be pastored.

Anyway, I left Atlanta still asking the Lord just how significant was this chance meeting, and I think that I wont know for years. I was grateful for every minute, but may this whole trip be... Well... A catalyst for God glorifying change in my own life, my ministry, and my church.

Amen.

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