:what is a blessing?:

over the last 10 days, i've really been stretched by God to understand the meaning for receiving. i've been thinking a LOT on this word.. blessing.

bless /blɛs/
–verb (used with object), blessed or blest, bless·ing.
1. to consecrate or sanctify by a religious rite; make or pronounce holy.
2. to request of God the bestowal of divine favor on: Bless this house.

so i guess for janice and i, we've been experiencing an amazing string of blessings.

i have a question for the one (or two) people who are still reading this blog... is a blessing from God still a blessing if you are expecting it?

i guess a blessing, no matter if you wanted it, or even asked for it, is still a blessing... but take a second to contemplate this... if you are EXPECTING a blessing from God, can it really be considered a blessing?

i think yes and no.

here's an example. for the life of me i was 101% sure that janice and i were going to get upgraded on our flight to YVR on Oasis. you know, pastor, from the vine, friend of John Snelgrove and Tom Read, THEY both had upgrades.. no worries, i'll get the upgrade. i was EXPECTING this very selfish blessing from God. when i get my ticket, not only was i NOT upgraded, i was stuck in the middle next to a smelly chinese man who wouldn't share the armrest. (i will MOSDEF blog about this later). so if God DID somehow give me that upgrade, would that really have been a blessing, or would that just have been me being arrogant with my god to deliver things for me just because i not only believe in him, but i'm a... dun dun daaah! a PASTOR.

yeah right. God showed me.

what about this example. i was expecting, as we have always had in each of our 3 trips to YVR, our own car. when we got off the plane, dad told us that the 20 yr old BMW has kicked the bucket, and it's really only good for scrap. now i pulled a hissy fit that would make any hill valley girl snap their finger in the z formation and say nuh huh sister, no you didn't! janice was like, "what's your problem?" i was like, we have no car!!!!!! we are stuck and dead in the water! panic! stress!

so here i was, more angry and tired because i was dirty and jet-lagged, i failed to see the hidden blessing that would come, which was that Kevin basically said he'll hang with us the whole time. i was thinking what a burden on him, but as the days went on it was awesome spending more time with my brother in law, and getting to know his heart. hearing his passion to see change in his local church. to reverse dunk over some pour soul and then draw comparisons to Kobe. to eat great, and sleep in. now THAT was a blessing.

Psalm 37:4
Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.

so i guess my attitude would be to pray for everything, yet not expect anything. because the moment i start thinking, yeah, I AM christian, I AM a believer.. so I DESERVE my flight upgrade?!?!? no way. but i say, Lord, i'd love an upgrade, but your will not mine. then if doesn't come, the so be it. you may laugh, but i think you'll find somewhere in your heart you do the same. something about a speck of dust versus the 4 * 4 tree stuck in your eye mofo.

the only time i'll ever believe that i deserve what i'm praying for is when it directly and completely results in the Lord receiving Glory and praise. things like praying for healing, for salvation, for provision, for comfort of the downcast... you know, the real Isaiah 61 stuff.

so this is where i am. living a dream, and really trying to understand this word.. blessing.

now, in my amazing hotel room in Atlanta, i'll try and meditate on this more in my own personal jacuzzi. (i wasn't expecting it so it's ok)

oh and for anyone who's still reading, i'll be updating every night here in Atlanta(my time), then i'll be updating something like twice a week from now on. blessing. and if you're wondering why no pictures, it's because i forgot to bring my cable to get the photos off my camera... so fotos later ok?) bie bie bie (N'sync style)


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