my mood was gelatinous for quite a while.. cuz... well.. that was what i was feeling.

but now i'm infuriated, pissed, angry, and beside myself. i direct all my anger towards computers. i spent 2 days conquering my inbox, churning out project by project.. feeling rather good about myself, then today i open my computer to find that my files have been corrupted and i can't open the files. i've made backups, but guess what, same fate. for those that don't know, i'm a graphic designer, so all my work is in a little electric briefcase stuck inside the computer. this is what i think happened. over the last 3 days, the little elves inside the damn thing that are supposed to get back my briefcase, accidentally spilt coffee all over it, and now my homework has been dirty beyond recognition. i'm not a tech dude, but that's the best explanation so far.

i actually was in denial the whole of yesterday because i spent the whole day trying to get them back. thinking that computers sleep as we do, i figured that a good nights rest would do the trick. i even cleaned the monitor and dusted all the connect accessories. i knew i was in for trouble when i started talking/begging the harddisk to help me. them, almost in tears, i got up, and left.

i still believe that computers are advanced lifeforms. they have feelings, a heart, a warped mind, coupled with a sick sense of humor, and a definite attitude. if you dont treat CPU well... then he treat you the same way. all computers have an inferiority complex. its like the beautiful girl that always surrounds herself people she knows she is prettier than. that false sense of comparative beauty.. which in itself is not beauty at all. well computers are the same. they know that they are vital to everyone. yet we never give them anything but requests, orders. when was the last time you thanked your computer? they do this every now and then to make sure you understand that they are wanting love. because they are so stinkin smart, and just so cheeky, they pull this crap to get your attention back on them.

so.. learn from my trials and adventures. go buy a nice set of speakers for your computer, or a nice mouse pad, dust the old thing up, give him a kiss, don't be shy, and then very soon, you'll be wondering why you have no more computer problems.

or just stick your foot in the whole thing, throw the whole piece 'O crap out the window so it can land and be smashed to one thousand bits, pile in up in a pit, set fire to it, and then for good measure you piss on it to douse the flames, while roasting your zip disks and floppies over it. after that send the ashes and receipt to dell and claim for problems with the word processor.

anyways, its your choice.

Comments

Popular Posts