went to a friends house for a big dinner. it's weird hanging with large groups of people... just chill'in, eating, laughing, you know.... i'm sure you too have had had a dinner party once. since it's the new year, i've been super reflective, and so last night i took a step back and looked at the room full of people that i now call family. it has taken a full year, almost to the day for me to get to this point, but i'm here now, and i will never leave. ofcourse, i have God and God alone to thank for my new friends and situation... but it was just nice to look at them all together laughing, eating, and then sigh a sigh that is of utter happiness. mushiness aside, it was a good night with wonderful cuisine of pizzahut, a little wine, and an epic battle of the sexes through charades.

fun..... no E, no smoking of any sort, no drunkness, no swearing,... just a group of Christians spending a some time together. people will always look at the Christian life and laugh at it, saying that we dont live or that we're boring. hmph. i ask that very same person, what is SO good about your life? i used to live it, so don't think that my argurment isn't valid. we were in Bonnie's beautiful home, freshly full from the great grub, we had one guy playing some nice jazz on the piano with me and Josh adding some improv vocals, laughter all over the room from smaller groups of idle banter, people watching Shaolin soccer, and then another group helping with the cleaning up.... it was at that moment that i thought... i was very very glad to be where i was. how often have i done that as a non-Christian? not once. not so 'clean' before. just one of the many revelations i've had this year.

just a reflection... not even a brain fart.

anyways, so we went from that happy cheerful place to a club, as part of the nights festivities. for me, the night club was... not as good as the dinner. it's always fun to dance for me, regardless of the situation, and i must say that hearing the hip hop made me smile all night long. but then, the smoke, the heat and sweat, the people, the mean stares and bitchy attitudes, it just got to me... don't y'all hate that feeling when you're just sandwiched in a packed club, smoke being blown at you, people just walking into you all sweaty and smelly, spilling vodka all down your arm... oh well. its fun every now and then, just not everynight anymore.... maybe i'm getting old, maybe i'm just becoming a herb. who knows.

here's a brain fart: is blogging just another way to draw attention to yourself? an on-line dairy is like a fake (or not entirely true) look into someone's everyday life. but some people, as i have just done, just blog to vent as though the person who made me not happy would be reading it. blogging is also a polite way of screaming to some one, "THIS IS ME! READ IT AND LIKE IT!" its better sometimes than writing an email, as it'll keep you uptodate with that person. so what am i'm trying to get at?

i have no idea. thus the intrigue of a brain that farts.


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